I met this guy at my workplace. Let’s just call him Mr. Ef.
From the very first glance, the very first moment I saw him, I told myself, “Stay away.” You know the type: outspoken, friendly to everyone, always in the spotlight. People like that? They're my weakness. I’m quiet, reserved, and I thrive in peace. So for the first month, I tried so hard to keep my distance. I avoided eye contact at all costs and steered clear of any interaction.
But life has a funny way of throwing you right into the things you’re trying to avoid.
One day, as a clueless newbie, I had a question and asked my senior for help. Instead of answering, he went straight to Mr. Ef and asked him on my behalf. Just great. That moment opened the door I never wanted to even peek through. He ended up helping me with a customer issue, and I was genuinely grateful… but also panicked. From that day, I became even more cautious. I did everything I could to not communicate with him again.
Maybe he noticed. Maybe he sensed my anxious energy because one day, out of nowhere, he asked, “Why do you look like you’re scared of me?” I had no answer. I just stayed silent.
I even avoided the pantry just to not bump into him. I knew how he is. The moment he gets comfortable with someone, especially quiet types like me, he starts teasing and joke around. And I? I just want to work in peace, without drama, without noise.
But he’s… attentive.
Whenever my team lead speaks to me, he always look like he was alert and that makes me anxious. He often tries to steal glances at me, and while I pretend not to notice, my heart race every time.
Lately though… things changed.
He helped me once, and no matter how much I wanted to keep my distance, it felt rude to stay cold toward someone who just being kind (plus he did nothing wrong). One day, as we left the office, I decided to be little nice so I asked like, “How are you going back?”, “What’s your schedule tomorrow?” Just small talk.
And then, once again:
“Why do you look like you're afraid of me?”
"I’m not!” (But inside? I definitely am.)
The next day, he sat directly in front of me and since then, my peaceful routine shattered. He keeps glancing at me and teasingly asking, “Why are you nervous tho?” Since that short conversation the night before, my heart has been uncooperative, which is exactly what I wanted to avoid.
Sometimes, he also makes comments that hurt, and I’m torn between being flustered and frustrated. I even started ignoring him (again) and he, in return went silent. The next day, he sat behind me. This time, he was a little more respectful. No constant teasing. He even apologized when he did. He stopped asking why I seemed nervous. For the first time, he gave me some space.
A few days after, we accidentally crossed paths at the pantry. I tried to escape quickly, but he greeted me with a simple, “Are you still mad?” And I swear, I melted. Now, I catch myself glancing at him whenever I can, though I still keep my distance. He’s just… so attractive.
There was that moment at the lockers. Mine is next to his. He was already there, leaning on his locker, scrolling his phone. I was freaking out but pretending to be cool. He knows now... he knows staring at me makes me nervous, and he uses it. I hate him for that.
The most confusing and painful part of all this? I don’t know his true intentions. Is he genuine or just playing around? Does he already have a girlfriend? A fiancΓ©e, maybe? I don’t know. And not knowing… that’s what hurts the most.
